Spongebob's New Car
by Smarty 94
Summary: After his patty wagon breaks down once again, Spongebob decides to buy a new car. Unfortunatley, after buying it, he takes it for a test drive.


In the living room, Bugs, CatDog, Duncan and GDN were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when they heard something backfiring outside.

"What the hell was that?" said Duncan.

"Sounds like something's about to explode." Said GDN.

He was right. Something did explode outside, and Spongebob came crashing through the window, screaming and onto the recliner.

"Unbelievable." Said Spongebob.

"I know, I paid lots of good money just to get those windows installed." Said Bugs.

"I mean that my car broke down again." Said Spongebob, "That's the 20th time this month that's happened."

Cat looked out the window and saw the destroyed patty wagon.

"It ain't that big a deal. I could get it fixed up in 3 to 4 weeks." Said Cat.

"34 weeks?!" said Spongebob.

"No, 3 to 4 weeks." Said Cat.

"How am I going to get to work on time?" said Spongebob.

"You could try riding with Shaggy." Said Dog.

"Thanks, but the last time that happened, it wasn't pretty." Said Spongebob.

**Flashback to last week**

Last week, Spongebob, Shaggy and Scooby Doo were in a van at a drive through restaurant.

"Like, I'll take 25 cheeseburgers, 50 large fries, 30 ten piece nuggets-" Shaggy kept on going on as Scooby was pleased and Spongebob was shocked.

**End Flashback**

"There's no limit to what Shaggy and Scooby can eat, and Shag is as lean as a pencil." Said Spongebob.

"Yeah, Owen's very overweight and there's no limit to what he can eat." Said Duncan.

"Back to the car bit, how can Spongebob drive, he doesn't have a driver's license." Said GDN.

"You don't need one when driving a sandwich." Said Spongebob.

"Oh yeah, that saying." Said Bugs.

"And for the record, I got one last month." Said Spongebob.

"Why don't you buy a car?" said GDN.

"I don't make that kind of money, I only make minimum wage." Said Spongebob before he thought of something, "Well, I do have some gold and platinum and I'm not sure if it's valuable."

"You've got gold and platinum?" asked Duncan, "Dude, that kind of stuff is valuable. It can get to thousands of dollars per ounce."

"It is?"

"Yeah it's valuable." Said Cat.

"How much do you have?" asked Dog.

"About 50 pounds of each." Said Spongebob.

Cat pulled out a calculator and did some math until he got the answer.

"You have about millions of dollars' worth." Said Cat.

"Really?" Spongebob said, "If you'll excuse me, I have to buy a car."

He then ran to his room and grabbed his gold and platinum before he ran out of the mansion.

"Was it wise to tell him that?" said Dog.

"Nah, how can he get a car very fast?" said GDN.

"There's a car dealership that instantly sales cars instead of waiting for delivery." Said Bugs.

GDN became surprised.

"Oh boy." Said GDN.

Later, everyone else living in the mansion, Sonic the Hedgehog, Sandy Cheeks, Max Goof and Roxanne, the Teen Titans, Owen, Mike, Izzy, Gwen, Courtney, Zoey, Shaggy, Scooby Doo, Danny Fenton, Tucker Foley, Sam Manson, Randy Cunningham and Theresa Fowler were sitting in the dining room, waiting for Spongebob to return so he can cook the dinner.

"Like, where could he be?" wondered Shaggy.

"Buying a car." Said Duncan.

"Seriously, at this hour?" said Beast Boy.

"How long does it take to buy a car?" said Sonic.

"He went to a car dealership that gives the car instantly." Said Cat.

"Seriously?" said Danny.

"He should be back any minute now." Said Mike.

The group then heard a honking outside and ran to the garage and saw Spongebob sitting in a red Ferrari.

"What do you think of these wheels?" asked Spongebob.

Everyone was surprised at what they saw.

"Wow, you bought a red Ferrari." Said Robin.

"How much did it cost?" asked Randy.

"I don't know, I just gave the dealer all my gold and platinum." Said Spongebob.

Raven leaned over to Sandy's ear.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but for some reason, I'm now attracted to him." Said Raven.

"Wait in line partner, he's mine." Said Sandy.

"Come on, you need to cook us dinner." Said Owen.

"In a minute, right now I have to admire this beautiful car." Said Spongebob.

The group (minus Spongebob) then left the garage and returned to the dining room.

"Hey wait a minute, he's been gone for two and a half hours getting that new car." Said Gwen, "He should be cooking right this minute."

"Yeah." Everyone aggred.

"Uh guy's, what do you think Spongebob meant by admiring his new car?" said Cyborg.

Everyone did some thinking until Max realized what Spongebob meant.

"Dammit, he's going to take it for a drive." Said Max.

The group then heard a screeching noise and rushed to the garage and saw that Spongebob and the Ferrari were gone.

"How do you like that." Said Bugs.

"I know, there's a crazy sponge driving a Ferrari." Said Theresa.

"No, he burned a bunch of rubber on the garage floor." Bugs pointed to the floor that had tire marks on it, "It's going to take hours to get these tire marks off."

"That's the least of our problems." Said Courtney, "Spongebob's driving a new Ferrari over the speed limit."

"Reah." Said Scooby.

"Where could he possibly go?" said Tucker.

"Well, if I recall correctly, Ferraris can get up to 360 miles per hour." Said GDN.

Everyone became surprised.

"Oh boy, he's probably in Canada now." Said Mike.

Later, everyone was in the living room, waiting for Spongebob to return after he took his Ferrari out for a test drive.

"Where could he be, In fact, when will he call?" wondered Owen.

"Re rould rall rany rinute row." Said Scooby.

"Seriously Scoob, I have no idea what you just said." Said Sonic.

The phone rang and Mike picked it up.

"Hello?" said Mike.

On the other line was Spongebob, still driving his Ferrari.

"Hey, you're not going to believe this!" said Spongebob.

Mike said to everyone, "It's Spongebob."

Bugs took the phone, "Where are you, what happened?"

"I have no idea where I'm at, not even what happened! I just turned on the engine and I end up on the freeway!" said Spongebob.

Spongebob heard a horn honking.

"HEY, LEARN HOW TO DRIVE YOU MORON!" said Spongebob.

"Don't go yelling at the drivers. They might press charges on you." Said Bugs.

"Are you kidding, I'm going faster than the speed of light!" Said Spongebob, "No one can see me driving by, not even my license plate!"

"Look, make a turn off the road." Said Bugs.

"Can't. I'm on the fast lane. You can't tell because of the way everyone is driving!" said Spongebob.

"Where are you now?" asked Bugs.

"Let's see." Spongebob crashed through a school and out the other side, destroying it, "I just destroyed Casper High!"

"There goes Amity Parks education system." Said Danny.

"Quick question. Randy and Theresa used to go to Norrisville, right?" asked Spongebob.

"Yeah." Said Bugs.

Spongebob drove through Norrisville High and out the other side, destroying it.

"I just destroyed the high school." Said Spongebob.

"There goes Norrisvilles education system." Said Randy.

"Now, I'm passing some type of convention! It's a bee's convention!" Said Spongebob.

The bees then proceeded to sting Spongebob nonstop.

"OH THE PAIN!" said Spongebob, "Those bee stings really hurt!"

"Just be glad you didn't pass by a wasps convention." Said Bugs.

"I just passed by a wasps convention!" said Spongebob.

"Oh boy." Said Bugs.

The wasps proceeded to sting Spongebob nonstop.

"I'm swelling up right now!" said Spongebob.

"Try not to say anything to cause him any harm." Said Shaggy.

"Right." Said Bugs before he spoke into the phone again, "Where you at right now?"

"Okay, I'm at-"Bugs lost the signal to Spongebob.

"Hello, Squarepants?" Bugs hanged up, "Lost the signal."

"Where could he possibly be now?" wondered Beast Boy.

"It's not like he's going to crash through the garage door." Said GDN.

Sure enough, they heard a crash outside the garage.

"Nice." Raven said sarcastically.

The group went outside and saw Spongebob's Ferrari badly smashed up.

"Oh man." Spongebob said weakly, "Where did that garage door come from?"

"Squarepants, you okay?" asked Zoey.

"Yeah, I'll live. But this car isn't going to make it." Said Spongebob.

Bugs looked at the garage door and was shocked.

"Oh man, another ruined garage door." Said Bugs, "This is going to take some time to fix."

"I know for a fact that my drivers license will be revoked very soon." said Spongebob.

"What about the garage?" asked Bugs.

"Don't worry about it, I'll pay for the damages." Said Spongebob.

"How you even going to do that?" said Cat.

"I'll sell the car." Said Spongebob.

"You sure?" said Starfire, "Because it seems like no one will want to take this car."

"Of course I'm sure. The guy I bought this car from is very gullible. A moron that suffers short term memory loss if you would." Said Spongebob.

"People are that dumb?" said Duncan, "I should do that."

Duncan left the garage.

"I'll sell this thing after work tomorrow for my gold and platinum that I gave the guy." Said Spongebob.

"You know what I find very shocking about this?" Said Randy.

"Rhat?" said Scooby.

"The airbag didn't explode after he crashed it all those times." Said Randy.

The airbag then exploded onto Spongebob's face. Everyone but Sandy left.

"I don't know if you know this, but I still love you, even if you do lots of crazy things." Said Sandy.

"I'm highly aware of that." Said Spongebob.

"I don't know how I can get Bugs to thank you for all this." Sandy said.

Sandy heard a siren in the distance.

"What in tarnation did you do?" asked Sandy.

"Oh, I might of destroyed lots of property in all 50 states." Said Spongebob.

"All 50 states, how'd you get to Hawaii? Its ocean locked." Said Sandy.

"You'd be amazed at what this Ferrari can do." Said Spongebob.

Sandy then left the garage.

"This could not get any worse." Said Spongebob.

He was wrong, because a helicopter light shined on him and he noticed.

"Aw, what the hell." Spongebob passed out on the airbag.

The next day, Spongebob was talking to the person that sold him the Ferrari, Lube (CatDog).

"So you see, after you sold me the Ferrari, it broke down after I made it to my house." Said Spongebob.

"Duh…I can't give you a refund, nor can I refund your gold and platinum. It's a policy." Said Lube.

"Look, you don't understand what I'm saying." Spongebob said before his cell phone rang. He answered it.

"Hello? Oh hey." Spongebob turned to Lube, "It's my man that knows the price changes of gold and platinum." Spongebob turned back to his phone, "What is it?" Spongebob became shocked, "What? Gold and platinum is now worthless? Shoot. And I just gave it to some guy yesterday. Okay buy." Spongebob hanged up his cell and turned back to Lube.

"Looks like you lost, gold and platinum is now worth a penny per ounce." Spongebob turned to leave but was stopped by Lube.

"Duh wait!" Lube ran to a safe, pulled out Spongebob's gold and platinum and gave it to Spongebob, "Take it. You're getting a full refund."

"Really, gee thanks." Spongebob left the dealership.

Outside was Duncan, sitting in the passenger seat of the patty wagon, holding a cell phone.

"Got my gold and platinum back." Said Spongebob.

Spongebob put the gold and platinum in the trunk before he went to the driver's seat and drove off.

"With my help. After all, it was your idea to have me give you the fake phone call about the gold and platinum being useless." Said Duncan.

"At least I have my old car repaired in very little time." Said Spongebob.

"Yeah, and at the cost of nothing." Said Duncan.

Spongebob then thought of something, "Hey, let's get something to eat, I'm buying."


End file.
